death & taxes...and one (un)certain thing...

some say these are the only certainties in life. what do you think?

maybe it's the looming april 15th deadline swiftly approaching or the depths of my lenten contemplation but my mind has been immersed in 'certainty' these past few weeks.

first of all, what a funny concept. both disarming and comforting, 'absolute certainty' is one of those things we humans love and hate.

we adore its balming influence, particularly as it soothes the ache of our cracked spirits. the longing to hold onto something we believe to be truth is a potent medicinal indeed. it sets us right again, somehow.

oh, but how certainty can burrow like a thorn in your flesh. whether a mere prick or a deep gouge to your soulskin, certainty--its presence or absence in your life--can break your heart.

as i calculated my 2009 taxable donations a few days ago, i looked down at the kitchen table and saw sharpie scrawls of the estimated value of these goods. it made me smile. despite being considered one of the great certainties in life, i didn't have certainty at all...but simply an estimate.

sure, taxes are here to stay (that's a whole other blog scribble) but they still require faith. faith in estimates, in the value of mathematics or a good accountant, and in the many handlers of these lil' things we call tax monies.

then, there's those lenten prayers. what happens with prayer? again, a little act so disarming and yet calming. even in times of my utmost disbelief, prayer is the language i cling to...offered to a God who is both all certainty and all mystery. do i know these prayers or--more accurately--this gibberish that rolls off my mind's tongue, is acted upon or even heard? well...you see my point...

taxes come around every year. and death is possible anytime.

but it is somehow faith--that which anchors our belief in the (un)certain--can be the most certain thing of all.